The holidays are a common time for self-care to become neglected. (Speaking from both personal and professional experience here!) Stay centered this holiday season by continuing to practice self-care amidst the barrage of distractions.
1. Just say “No.”
There are tons of wonderful holiday activities to do in the Houston area. The downside of this is that we may find ourselves getting overwhelmed. This holiday season, consider what activities or commitments you can say “no” to in order to reserve physical, financial, emotional, and mental resources. This may mean buying pre-made food instead of cooking from scratch, sending emailed holiday cards, deciding not to attend every single event, or being intentional in not over-extending yourself financially. Try making a values list of what is really important to you in life. If your calendar is getting too full, consider nixing the one or two commitments that least align with these values.
2. Practice mindfulness as a way to enjoy the holidays.
Mindfulness includes the practice of intentionally directing our attention to the present moment. The holidays in particular can be a time rich with sensory experiences. Make it a point to direct your attention to the sights, sounds, smells, and tastes of the holidays. Allow yourself to fully experience the taste of familiar foods during the holidays. Simply allow yourself to enjoy a beautifully lit Christmas tree. As other thoughts enter your mind, simply let them pass and gently redirect your attention to the colors, sights, smells, and sounds around you. You deserve to pause and fully experience joy.
3. Practice clearly stating your needs and expectations with your support system.
Whether you are celebrating with friends or family, each person goes into the holiday season with unspoken hopes, fears, and expectations about the season. Often, our expectations and hopes for our celebrations may not be identical to those of our family members. Make space beforehand to talk with your partner, friends, or family members about what traditions are most meaningful to you, and why they are meaningful.
4. Honor your grief and loss.
For those of us that have experienced loss of loved ones, the holidays can bring waves of complex and deeply held emotions. We may experience both feelings of loss and sadness, as well as warm feelings brought about by memories of loved ones. For some, the holidays may be associated with particularly painful childhood memories or trauma. These feelings have a way of rising and falling just beneath the surface and ultimately affecting our behavior in ways that may feel confusing at times. Take care of yourself this season by making space to journal and/or talk with a safe person about the emotions and memories that surface for you during the holiday season.
5. Behold the power of 20 minutes to yourself.
Amidst the frenzied activity of the holidays, it is often easy to lose sight of our own needs. Make it a priority to set aside some time for yourself on the busiest of days. This may look like carving out 20-30 minutes in the middle of the day to relax and rest. You may use this time to take a nap, or just practice relaxation exercises. This quiet time can also be a great opportunity to check in with yourself. How are you feeling physically? What emotions are you experiencing? What do you need today? Practicing just 20 minutes of intentional self-care can often provide a huge payoff in terms of being more able to enjoy rest of the day, as well as having a reduced physical and emotional hangover after the activity has subsided.
Written by Kim Jones, MA, LPC, LMFT
Kim Jones is a Houston-based therapist and professional speaker who specializes in working with individuals and couples recovering from relationship distress, mood disorders, and anxiety disorders. For more information about Kim, check out https://kimjoneslpc.com/about-kim-jones-ma-l/ .